Motivation . . . or a lack thereof.

I have (of course) set some pretty basic New Year's Resolutions. One BIGGIE was that I want to live a healthier life style to not only set a good example for my children and help them to be healthy adults, but also to be sexier for hubby as well as . . . well, healthier. After my mother died from breast cancer last year, I've been face to face with my own mortality and I'd like to make sure that I make it to a ripe old healthy age . . . barring any major unforseeables. I just can't bear the thought of my daughter being left without her mother until she's well settled in life. I want to play with my grand kids and babysit all the time and be old enough to be my daughter's friend as well as her mother. Granted, being her mother is far more important that being her friend but as she gets older and settled in life, I hope that we can be more than just family. I think of all the things I've wanted to ask my mother since she's passed away and all I can think is that I've missed out on so much. Just about the time I was starting to really appreciate my mother, she left us.

Anyway, back on track, I set my alarm clock for 6 every morning. Every morning, the alarm clock goes off, I push the off button and promptly fall back to sleep. I've said, "Hubby, kick me out of bed when the alarm goes off!" Such a waste of breath since he doesn't even hear the alarm go off. I think tonight I'll move it to my dresser so I have to actually get up to turn it off. Since the alarm clock is actually my cell phone, I guess I'll have to charge it tomorrow while I'm working out. I wish I were one of those people who snaps awake at 5 in the morning and is really productive in the mornings and really takes on the day. Unfortunately, I'm more of a night owl. I mean, I love mornings . . . really. I love the freshness of everything. I love feeling super productive when I've managed to get a ton of housework done before anyone even wakes up. I love riding in the mornings (in the summer when the sun comes up before my daughter does). I simply wish mornings came a few hours later in the day.

I tend to look at my failings so far as just one day at a time. "I didn't do so hot today but tomorrow is a new day". I'm hoping that one day at a time is a good way for me. I'm hoping (and trying desperately to make it so) that tomorrow is a great day where I accomplish a lot and meet all my goals. I am a bit hindered this week as we are all battling a cold but this too shall pass.

On a brighter note, I am managing to be pretty consistant with my other resolutions. I do not let the dishes pile up, I vacuum and sweep every day. I fold the laundry when the dryer is finished with it and I make the bed . . . when hubby isn't in the bed. I clean the bathrooms and mop every other day and dust on the other days. I have yet to clean the windows this year but that may happen tomorrow. Hubby will be gone for the day and therefore distractions will be at a minimum. The baby has to take a nap at some point! Sadly, her room is the least cleaned room in the house since I tend to do most of my housework while she's sleeping.

I guess tomorrow is another day. Tomorrow I WILL get up on time and I WILL use the bowflex machine that is just sitting here. I WILL feed the horses before daylight and we WILL go for a walk tomorrow to get out of the house. I WILL keep my food journal and I WILL accomplish all of my goals before going to bed tomorrow evening. They say it takes 30 days to change a habit so I WILL make it through 30 days of accomplishing everything I've set myself to. I know I can . . . it's just getting up on these cold winter mornings after being up all night that do me in but it will not be my downfall tomorrow. Tomorrow is THE New Day.

Trying to Prioritize My Life

I'm a 30 year old wife and mother of one. I spend the majority of my waking hours chasing my beautimous daughter around the house and trying to remember what day of the week/month it is. Being a housewife with a one year old and a husband who's job is quite different from the normal 9-5, the days of the week/month have little effect on me with the exception of a few important dates that are brilliantly noted in my cell phone with an appropriate reminder so that if I do forget, I am easily reminded. Some would say that I live the life of Riley but I say to do that you need a full time nanny to be at your beckon call. I don't really want a nanny to take over parenting full-time as I love spending time with my daugther but it's the four sad, long, equid faces that I see staring at me over the fence that I long to spend some time with. Maybe an hour or two per day? I long to be able to watch the horses learn in the ways that I use to. I long to feel the reins in my hands and the power beneath me. I long to not feel like a horrid horse owner. My horses are far from starving and neglected but their fitness has not been a priority for some time. My beautiful stallion sits and waits to be saddle broke and shown as does my young gelding. My old guy is tired of being the one ridden because he's simply the safest for me to let my darling daughter ride (with me, of course).

The list of prioroties is endless. I want to be a good wife, mother, horse owner, dog owner, person, etc. I want to be successful in life and maybe one day I'll do a blog on my version of successful. I want the joy of riding with my daughter and husband and our other future child. I want to work out every day and feel the sweat and the aches associated with the workout. I need to work on my prioritization because lately, it seems that sleep wins out over the exercise and the baby and the desire to stay roasty-toasty overcome the need to work the horses. Now, I'm not saying that I'd leave my daughter by herself for any length of time but hubby can be home for quite a stretch and I could certainly take advantage of it! Also, we have a great friend who lives with us who would happily watch her for an hour or two. I have no excuses. I guess I'm just a pansy.